Research Into Pacing
There’s some suspicion among researchers that pacing of behavior is associated with a feeling of closeness and trust, and that it makes it easier for people to talk with one another. Have you ever heard of such an idea?
The UK-based Centre for Research and Evidence on Security Threats (CREST) is currently funding Ph.D.-level research into “nonverbal mimicry.”
My research aims to find out whether it is possible that if the interviewer was properly trained in mimicry they could use it as an information elicitation technique.
By the end of 2019 I will have completed the first experimental study of my PhD. Results of this study will illuminate whether nonverbal mimicry does increase according to relationship closeness. I will then be carrying out my second study, based entirely on the outcome of study one.
Is nonverbal mimicry an important tool in eliciting information?
Metaprograms of Movement
Science tells us that we can read a person’s behavior and use that information to predict what they’ll do. Who’d have thought it?
How Cell Phone Movements Can Assess Your Personality
The researchers who wrote the referenced article correlated cell phone call logs and accelerometer movement logs with Big Five personality assessments of their subjects and found some interesting things. For example, “sensitive or neurotic females often checked their phones or moved with their phones regularly well past midnight. Sensitive or neurotic males did the opposite.”
If you haven’t looked into the Big Five Personality Traits as an addition to the meta-programs you already work with, I’ll suggest looking into them. They are:
- Openness to new experiences;
- Conscientiousness;
- Extraversion;
- Agreeableness; and
- Neuroticism.
(See how the first letters spell “OCEAN” to help you remember?)
My intro to them was the book, Snoop: What Your Stuff Says About You, by Sam Gosling, Ph.D. It’s worth the read.
That Guy Looks Fishy To Me
An early depiction of hypnosis on TV. Original air date September 22, 1959. Based on an allegedly-true story, as all of the episodes of this show were.
Know Who You’re Talking To
…researchers … analyzed the responses of 316 people who completed online questionnaires designed to reveal their personality traits and how easily they might be persuaded.
It’s NOT Failure
It’s not failure. It’s feedback. And that matters more than you may realize.
Nine Nonverbal Communication Channels
Kendra Cherry gives a very nice overview of nine distinct communication channels apart from the words we choose:
Nonverbal communication plays an important role in how we convey meaning and information to others, as well as how we interpret the actions of those around us. The important thing to remember when looking at such nonverbal behaviors is to consider the actions in groups. What a person actually says along with his or her expressions, appearance, and tone of voice might tell you a great deal about what that person is really trying to say.
I love the fine distinctions. Master these and send ten different messages at once.
Assuming Positive Intent
The “P” in “NLP” stands for “programming,” as in “computer programming.” I’ve found it very useful to learn basic computer programming and to read what programmers write about what they do.
Programmers work in teams, and “soft skills” are increasingly important in the field. Today I found a reference to one of NLP’s Presuppositions:
I began to realize that nobody–including myself–was really taking the time to understand the motivations of their colleagues. When John presented the situation to me, he thought he understood Gargamel’s motivations, and I didn’t question that understanding. Similarly, Gargamel thought he understood Dr. Claw’s motivations and neither he nor his manager questioned that understanding. But I had met both Gargamel and Dr. Claw. They are both very nice, generous people who don’t resemble their cartoon villain namesakes in the slightest.
Advising self
We do tend to take better care of others than we do ourselves. It’s so much easier to tell someone else how to make a positive change than to come to good conclusions about our own lives.
I’ve used that tendency to my own advantage many times, both in my own life and in my coaching of other people.
When someone comes to me and asks for advice, and I haven’t the slightest idea what to tell them, I ask, “If someone came to you with this same problem, what would you tell them to do?” I love the fact that they almost always come up with a great solution to their own problem.
Think More Rationally by Pretending You’re Giving Advice to Someone Else
Two new to the blogroll
After two years of benign neglect of this site, I updated the blogroll. I added two and wanted to draw your attention to them.
Andy Smith’s Practical NLP Podcast is just profoundly good. He explains the fundamentals of NLP in such a way that you can put them to immediate use in your everyday life no matter what your level of training.
Barking Up The Wrong Tree is… difficult to describe. I’ll let you have a look.
Got a favorite blog for NLP, hypnosis, persuasion, or related topics? Let me know in the comments!
Reading People
In one of my favorite blogs, Barking Up The Wrong Tree, we find five “how to read people” secrets backed by research:
- Don’t make the usual mistakes: Take context, clusters, baseline, and biases into consideration.
- First impressions are often accurate: With a number of traits you can trust your gut. But know which ones.
- Trust mimicry and emotional expression: But they have to be sustained and consistent.
- Awful people have tells: Pay attention to notice them. And look for narcissists in flashy clothing.
- Deepening voice and touching says “flirting”: True for both men and women.