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	<title>NLPhilia Blog &#187; Calibration</title>
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	<link>http://nlphilia.net</link>
	<description>NLP Articles, News, Trainings, and Products</description>
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		<title>Sharpening Observation</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2010/03/27/sharpening-observation/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2010/03/27/sharpening-observation/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 27 Mar 2010 19:45:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Thinking]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=455</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In the October 2009 issue of Smithsonian Magazine, there&#8217;s an article on Amy Herman, an art historian and lawyer, who uses fine art to teach the fine art of observation: A Caravaggio appeared on the screen. In it, five men in 17th-century dress are seated around a table. Two others stand nearby, and one of [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In the October 2009 issue of <cite>Smithsonian Magazine</cite>, there&#8217;s an article on Amy Herman, an art historian and lawyer, who uses fine art to teach the fine art of observation:</p>
<blockquote><p>A Caravaggio appeared on the screen. In it, five men in 17th-century dress are seated around a table. Two others stand nearby, and one of them, barely discernible in shadow, points a finger &#8212; accusingly? &#8212; at a young man at the table with some coins.</p>
<p>Among the officers a discussion arose about who robbed whom, but they soon learned there could be no verdict. No one was being accused or arrested, Herman said. The painting was The Calling of St. Matthew, and the man in the shadow was Jesus Christ. The cops fell silent.</p>
<p>Later, Deputy Inspector Donna Allen said, &#8220;I can see where this would be useful in sizing up the big picture.&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p>Some of the comments on the Web version of the article are interesting, too. One of them mentions <a href="http://www.sherlockian.net/canon/index.html">the Sherlock Holmes stories</a>. Another mentions a program called <a href="http://www.vtshome.org/">Visual Thinking Strategies</a>, something I hadn&#8217;t heard of before.</p>
<p>If I ever have the opportunity to take Ms. Herman&#8217;s training, I think I&#8217;ll do it. What about you?</p>
<p>Go read <a href="http://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/Teaching-Cops-to-See.html">Teaching Cops to See</a>, from Smithsonian Magazine</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2010/03/27/sharpening-observation/" rel="bookmark">Sharpening Observation</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2010-03-27 (Saturday).</p>
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		<title>Aggression is In Your Face</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/16/aggression-is-in-your-face/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/16/aggression-is-in-your-face/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 17 Jan 2010 03:19:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=428</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[We&#8217;ve intuited for ages that faces reflect personalities, and that we can &#8220;tell just by looking at them&#8221; what a person is really like. Some new research is bearing out our intuition, at least in the domain of aggression: Volunteers viewed photographs of faces of men for whom aggressive behavior was previously assessed in the [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>We&#8217;ve intuited for ages that faces reflect personalities, and that we can &#8220;tell just by looking at them&#8221; what a person is really like. Some new research is bearing out our intuition, at least in the domain of aggression:</p>
<blockquote><p>Volunteers viewed photographs of faces of men for whom aggressive behavior was previously assessed in the lab. The volunteers rated how aggressive they thought each person was on a scale of one to seven after viewing each face for either 2000 milliseconds or 39 milliseconds.</p>
<p>The photographs were very revealing: Volunteers’ estimates of aggression correlated highly with the actual aggressive behavior of the faces viewed, even if they saw the picture for only 39 milliseconds.</p></blockquote>
<p><a href="http://psychcentral.com/news/2009/11/02/facial-features-may-predict-volatility/9271.html"> Facial Features May Predict Volatility</a> is on Psych Central.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/16/aggression-is-in-your-face/" rel="bookmark">Aggression is In Your Face</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2010-01-16 (Saturday).</p>
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		<title>An Easier Way to Detect Lies</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/easier-detect-lies/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/easier-detect-lies/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 16 Jan 2010 00:37:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neuro]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rapport]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=398</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Cognitive Daily recently posted some research that may give us an easier way to improve our ability to tell when other people are lying to us: But what if there was a shortcut in sniffing out a lie, relying on our own instinctual behavior? Would it be possible to improve the lie-detecting abilities of ordinary [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cognitive Daily recently posted some research that may give us an easier way to improve our ability to tell when other people are lying to us:</p>
<blockquote><p>But what if there was a shortcut in sniffing out a lie, relying on our own instinctual behavior? Would it be possible to improve the lie-detecting abilities of ordinary people without all that training? A team led by Mariëlle Stel had a hunch that our tendency to mimic the physical and facial expressions of the people we are speaking to might help us to tell when they are lying.</p></blockquote>
<p>It isn&#8217;t what you are probably thinking. I think you&#8217;ll be surprised. Check it out:</p>
<p><a href="http://scienceblogs.com/cognitivedaily/2010/01/is_there_an_easier_way_to_dete.php">Is There an Easier Way to Detect Lies Than What You See on TV?</a></p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/easier-detect-lies/" rel="bookmark">An Easier Way to Detect Lies</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2010-01-15 (Friday).</p>
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		<title>Reading Basic Emotions</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/reading-basic-emotions/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/reading-basic-emotions/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 16 Jan 2010 00:21:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Neuro]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rapport]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[State Management]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=394</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Eyes for Lies points to a sweet video by Dr. David Matsumoto, &#8220;Characteristics of Basic Emotions&#8221;. In it, Dr. Matsumoto explains the differences between the seven &#8220;basic&#8221; or &#8220;universal&#8221; emotions and the rest.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://eyesforlies.blogspot.com/2010/01/emotions-explained-by-dr-david.html">Eyes for Lies</a> points to a sweet video by Dr. David Matsumoto, &#8220;Characteristics of Basic Emotions&#8221;. In it, Dr. Matsumoto explains the differences between the seven &#8220;basic&#8221; or &#8220;universal&#8221; emotions and the rest.</p>
<p><span style="text-align:center; display: block;"><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/reading-basic-emotions/#utm_source=feed&amp;utm_medium=feed&amp;utm_campaign=feed"><img src="http://img.youtube.com/vi/_UfZsFE2kP0/2.jpg" alt="" /></a></span></p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2010/01/15/reading-basic-emotions/" rel="bookmark">Reading Basic Emotions</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2010-01-15 (Friday).</p>
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		<title>Subtle is the New Micro</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2009/10/21/subtle-is-the-new-micro/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2009/10/21/subtle-is-the-new-micro/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Oct 2009 01:27:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=365</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I love, love, love Lie To Me. I&#8217;m fairly good at reading micro-expressions, having gone through an abbreviated version of Paul Eckman&#8217;s METT training a few years ago, and my NLP training and practice have improved my calibration and time-distortion skills. And I check out the Eyes for Lies blog every day, too, which led [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I love, love, love <a href="http://fox.com/lietome">Lie To Me</a>. I&#8217;m fairly good at reading micro-expressions, having gone through an abbreviated version of Paul Eckman&#8217;s METT training a few years ago, and my NLP training and practice have improved my calibration and time-distortion skills. And I check out the <a href="http://eyesforlies.blogspot.com/">Eyes for Lies</a> blog every day, too, which led me to this article: <a href="http://www.humintell.com/2009/09/subtle-expressions-key-to-detecting-deception/">Subtle Expressions Key to Detecting Deception</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>New research in a paper called Detecting Deception from Emotional and Unemotional Cues by Gemma Warren, Elizabeth Schertler and Peter Bull suggests that subtle expressions, not microexpressions, could be a more accurate tool in detecting deception.</p></blockquote>
<p>It&#8217;s an interesting distinction. Micro-expressions, which Eckman&#8217;s work covers, are full manifestiations of a facial expression which last only a fraction of a second. Subtle expressions, though, are the tiny twitches and incomplete movements that indicate a facial expression is on its way, even if said expression never makes it.</p>
<p>More cool stuff to learn.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2009/10/21/subtle-is-the-new-micro/" rel="bookmark">Subtle is the New Micro</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2009-10-21 (Wednesday).</p>
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		<title>Confessions Corrupt Eyewitnesses</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2009/02/04/confessions-corrupt-eyewitnesses/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2009/02/04/confessions-corrupt-eyewitnesses/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Feb 2009 18:33:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Linguistic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Modeling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Persuasion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=304</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Security guru Bruce Schneier brings us one of those things that flies in the face of conventional wisdom: People confess to crimes they don&#8217;t commit. They do it a lot. What&#8217;s interesting about this research is that confessions—whether false or true—corrupt other eyewitnesses&#8230; Yep. People will believe someone&#8217;s confession over their own experience. How can [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Security guru Bruce Schneier brings us one of those things that flies in the face of conventional wisdom:</p>
<blockquote><p>People confess to crimes they don&#8217;t commit. They do it a lot. What&#8217;s interesting about <a href="http://www3.interscience.wiley.com/journal/121580382/abstract">this research</a> is that confessions—whether false or true—corrupt other eyewitnesses&#8230;</p></blockquote>
<p>Yep. People will believe someone&#8217;s confession <strong>over their own experience</strong>.</p>
<p>How can we put this to work?</p>
<p><a href="http://www.schneier.com/blog/archives/2009/02/confessions_cor.html">Schneier on Security: Confessions Corrupt Eyewitnesses</a></p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2009/02/04/confessions-corrupt-eyewitnesses/" rel="bookmark">Confessions Corrupt Eyewitnesses</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2009-02-4 (Wednesday).</p>
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		<title>Lie to me soon</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2008/11/20/lie_to_me/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2008/11/20/lie_to_me/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 20 Nov 2008 21:39:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Free]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=276</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This article on Eyes for Lies points to what promises to be a very, very cool new TV series: Lie To Me. Based on the life and work of Dr. Paul Eckman: DR. CAL LIGHTMAN (Tim Roth, &#8220;The Incredible Hulk,&#8221; &#8220;Reservoir Dogs&#8221;) can detect the truth by analyzing a person&#8217;s face, body, voice and speech. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://eyesforlies.blogspot.com/2008/11/lie-to-me.html">This article on Eyes for Lies</a> points to what promises to be <a href="http://www.fox.com/lietome/">a very, very cool new TV series: <strong>Lie To Me</strong></a>. Based on the life and work of <a href="http://www.paulekman.com/">Dr. Paul Eckman</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>DR. CAL LIGHTMAN (Tim Roth, &#8220;The Incredible Hulk,&#8221; &#8220;Reservoir Dogs&#8221;) can detect the truth by analyzing a person&#8217;s face, body, voice and speech. When someone shrugs one shoulder, rotates their hand or raises their lower lip, Lightman knows they&#8217;re lying. By analyzing facial expressions, he can read feelings &#8211; from hidden resentment to sexual attraction to jealousy. But as Lightman well knows, his scientific ability is both a blessing and a curse in his personal life, where family and friends deceive each other as readily as criminals and strangers do. Lightman is the world&#8217;s leading deception expert, a scientist who studies facial expressions and involuntary body language to discover not only if you are lying but why.</p></blockquote>
<p>Premiers January 21 on Fox. (<em>Hey, Honey, set the TiVo, please!</em>)</p>
<p>Watch the trailer:</p>
<p><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/pGxDhWJ5y4k&#038;color1=0xb1b1b1&#038;color2=0xcfcfcf&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/pGxDhWJ5y4k&#038;color1=0xb1b1b1&#038;color2=0xcfcfcf&#038;hl=en&#038;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object></p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2008/11/20/lie_to_me/" rel="bookmark">Lie to me soon</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2008-11-20 (Thursday).</p>
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		<title>The Art of Expression</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2008/09/10/the-art-of-expression/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2008/09/10/the-art-of-expression/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Sep 2008 19:56:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Free]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Web sites]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=220</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Facial expression, that is. The Eyes for Lies blog points us to ArtNatomia: ARTNATOMY/ARTNATOMIA is a Flash interactive english/spanish tool. It is intended to facilitate the teaching and learning of the anatomical and biomechanical foundation of facial expression morphology. I&#8217;ve been playing with it; it&#8217;s fascinating and fun.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Facial expression, that is.</p>
<p>The <a href="http://eyesforlies.blogspot.com/">Eyes for Lies blog</a> points us to <a href="http://www.artnatomia.net/uk/index.html">ArtNatomia</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>ARTNATOMY/ARTNATOMIA is a Flash interactive english/spanish tool. It is intended to facilitate the teaching and learning of the anatomical and biomechanical foundation of facial expression morphology.</p></blockquote>
<p>I&#8217;ve been playing with it; it&#8217;s fascinating and fun.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2008/09/10/the-art-of-expression/" rel="bookmark">The Art of Expression</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2008-09-10 (Wednesday).</p>
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		<title>You&#8217;ve just got one of those faces</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2008/08/21/youve-just-got-one-of-those-faces/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2008/08/21/youve-just-got-one-of-those-faces/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 21 Aug 2008 23:55:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Persuasion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rapport]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/?p=213</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This article at the Mind Hacks Blog summarizes some research being done in the area of how we decide to trust (or mistrust) a person based on the shape of their face. It starts with an article at the Boston Globe, with an accompanying graphic illustration of the pertinent facial characteristics: behavioral scientists have also [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This <a href="http://www.mindhacks.com/blog/2008/08/judging_trustworthin.html">article at the Mind Hacks Blog</a> summarizes some research being done in the area of how we decide to trust (or mistrust) a person based on the shape of their face. It starts with an <a href="http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/articles/2008/08/17/confidence_game/?page=full">article at the Boston Globe</a>, with an accompanying <a href="http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/graphics/080817_face/">graphic illustration of the pertinent facial characteristics</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>behavioral scientists have also begun to unravel the inner workings of trust. Their aim is to decode the subtle signals that we send out and pick up, the cues that, often without our knowledge, shape our sense of someone&#8217;s reliability. Researchers have discovered that surprisingly small factors &#8211; where we meet someone, whether their posture mimics ours, even the slope of their eyebrows or the thickness of their chin &#8211; can matter as much or more than what they say about themselves. We size up someone&#8217;s trustworthiness within milliseconds of meeting them, and while we can revise our first impression, there are powerful psychological tendencies that often prevent us from doing so &#8211; tendencies that apply even more strongly if we&#8217;ve grown close.</p></blockquote>
<p>Here&#8217;s something else I found interesting:</p>
<blockquote><p>Another set of cues, and a particularly powerful one, is body language. Mimicry, in particular, seems to put us at our ease. Recent work by Tanya Chartrand, a psychology professor at Duke, and work by Jeremy Bailenson and Nick Yee, media scholars at Stanford, have shown that if a person, or even a computer-animated figure, mimics our movements while talking to us, we will find our interlocutor significantly more persuasive and honest.</p></blockquote>
<p>Cute, eh? Go read the Globe article; it&#8217;s great.</p>
<p>If you love academic writing, or even more detail, here&#8217;s a <a href="http://www.princeton.edu/~atodorov/Publications/Todorov_PNAS2008.pdf">PDF of a Princeton University study</a> on the subject.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2008/08/21/youve-just-got-one-of-those-faces/" rel="bookmark">You&#8217;ve just got one of those faces</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2008-08-21 (Thursday).</p>
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		<title>Coaching or Therapy via Internet?</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2008/03/14/coaching-or-therapy-via-internet/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2008/03/14/coaching-or-therapy-via-internet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Mar 2008 23:26:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Personal Change]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/2008/03/14/coaching-or-therapy-via-internet/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Freakonomics Blog points to a recent article (Net Gains for Mental Health) in the London Times: Type &#8220;online counsellor&#8221; into any internet search engine and hundreds of thousands of results will appear: with a click of the mouse, and a glance at a screen, you, too, can be cured of your depression, phobias and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/">The Freakonomics Blog</a> points to a recent article (<a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article3462088.ece">Net Gains for Mental Health</a>) in the London Times:</p>
<blockquote><p>Type &#8220;online counsellor&#8221; into any internet search engine and hundreds of thousands of results will appear: with a click of the mouse, and a glance at a screen, you, too, can be cured of your depression, phobias and eating disorders, go the claims. Unbelieveable? Perhaps not. A growing body of research has found that when &#8211; and this is crucial &#8211; it is carried out responsibly, and kept specific, online therapy is one of the most effective ways of dealing with the rising levels of mental ill-health. </p></blockquote>
<p>Some of us have been doing this sort of thing for a while. I&#8217;ve coached people via e-mail, Instant Messaging, and phone. I&#8217;m always careful to test &#8212; even more often than while face-to-face &#8212; and I&#8217;m far more likely to be explicit and overt. I can&#8217;t say I like doing it as much as face-to-face, but it <em>can</em> work.</p>
<p>I wouldn&#8217;t want an inexperienced or poorly-trained person doing it, though.</p>
<p>What do you think?</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2008/03/14/coaching-or-therapy-via-internet/" rel="bookmark">Coaching or Therapy via Internet?</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2008-03-14 (Friday).</p>
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		<title>Celebrate the lies of your children</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2008/01/18/celebrate-the-lies-of-your-children/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2008/01/18/celebrate-the-lies-of-your-children/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 19 Jan 2008 00:35:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Psych]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/2008/01/18/celebrate-the-lies-of-your-children/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The American Psychological Association has a relatively recent article on lying, and it has an interesting perspective: As humans, we are as much defined by our economy with the truth as we are by our cooperation. But that&#8217;s not necessarily a bad thing, say psychologists. Lying is a cognitive signal that people understand what others [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The American Psychological Association has a relatively recent article on lying, and it has an interesting perspective:</p>
<blockquote><p>As humans, we are as much defined by our economy with the truth as we are by our cooperation. But that&#8217;s not necessarily a bad thing, say psychologists. Lying is a cognitive signal that people understand what others are thinking, the important cognitive milestone known as theory of mind. </p></blockquote>
<p>Read more at <a href="http://www.apa.org/monitor/jan08/liar.html">Monitor on Psychology &#8211; Liar, liar, neurons fire</a></p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2008/01/18/celebrate-the-lies-of-your-children/" rel="bookmark">Celebrate the lies of your children</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2008-01-18 (Friday).</p>
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		<title>Deception</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/22/deception/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/22/deception/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 Nov 2007 08:16:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Persuasion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[State Management]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/22/deception/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Some recent conversations led me to do some Web browsing, and I found a couple of very interesting sites I want to share. Eyes for Lies: The Human Lie Detector Blog: Scientists have identified only 50 individuals who are able to spot deception with great accuracy after testing more than 15,000 people over several decades. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Some recent conversations led me to do some Web browsing, and I found a couple of very interesting sites I want to share.</p>
<p><strong><a href="http://eyesforlies.blogspot.com/">Eyes for Lies: The Human Lie Detector Blog</a>:</strong></p>
<blockquote><p>Scientists have identified only 50 individuals who are able to spot deception with great accuracy after testing more than 15,000 people over several decades. <em>Eyes for Lies</em> is one of the 50 people. </p></blockquote>
<p>This lady is able to detect lies 80% of the time, and she does a pretty good job of explaining how she does it. What she sees, hears, and feels, internal strategies she uses, and so on.</p>
<p><strong><a href="http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/">Truth About Deception: An Honest Look at Deception, Love and Romance</a></strong></p>
<blockquote><p>Discovering infidelity, or deception by a loved one, creates a lot of uncertainty. We try to help people work through their questions and concerns by providing a detailed look at deception, love and romance.</p></blockquote>
<p>This site is slanted heavily toward deception within romantic relationships, but the information I&#8217;ve read there is applicable outside those as well. I particularly appreciate their article on <a href="http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/get_others_to_be_honest/public/overcoming_fear.html">how to get people to tell you the truth</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/22/deception/" rel="bookmark">Deception</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2007-11-22 (Thursday).</p>
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		<title>Understanding Others</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/04/understanding-others/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/04/understanding-others/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 04 Nov 2007 08:24:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/04/understanding-others/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Four great presuppositions for your daily interactions can be found in the Lifehack.org article, Four Rules to Understand What Makes People Tick. The high points: People Mostly Care About Themselves People are Motivated by Selfish Altruism People Don’t Think Much Conformity is the Norm I think these fit nicely with Cialdini&#8217;s principles of persuasion.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Four great presuppositions for your daily interactions can be found in the Lifehack.org article, <a href="http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/four-rules-to-understand-what-makes-people-tick.html">Four Rules to Understand What Makes People Tick</a>. The high points:</p>
<ol>
<li>People Mostly Care About Themselves</li>
<li>People are Motivated by Selfish Altruism</li>
<li>People Don’t Think Much</li>
<li>Conformity is the Norm</li>
</ol>
<p>I think these fit nicely with Cialdini&#8217;s principles of persuasion.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2007/11/04/understanding-others/" rel="bookmark">Understanding Others</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2007-11-4 (Sunday).</p>
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		<title>SHUT UP AND LISTEN!</title>
		<link>http://nlphilia.net/2007/10/27/shut-up-and-listen/#utm_source=feed&#038;utm_medium=feed&#038;utm_campaign=feed</link>
		<comments>http://nlphilia.net/2007/10/27/shut-up-and-listen/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 27 Oct 2007 21:11:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael DeBusk</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Articles]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Calibration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Persuasion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[State Management]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://nlphilia.net/2007/10/27/shut-up-and-listen/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Another article I wrote for Persuasion 101, this one from 2003: Sometimes you&#8217;ll be faced with the task of persuading someone who is being, shall we say, unreasonable. Their emotions have gotten the best of them, perhaps, or maybe they just don&#8217;t like what you represent to them for whatever reason. I know what it&#8217;s [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Another article I wrote for <a href="http://persuasion101.com/">Persuasion 101</a>, this one from 2003:</p>
<p>Sometimes you&#8217;ll be faced with the task of persuading someone who is being, shall we say, unreasonable. Their emotions have gotten the best of them, perhaps, or maybe they just don&#8217;t like what you represent to them for whatever reason. I know what it&#8217;s like to be there. I work in a hospital and spend most of my &#8220;persuasion time&#8221; in either the locked Psychiatric Unit or the Emergency Department. You don&#8217;t get more &#8220;unreasonable&#8221; than some of the patients I&#8217;ve seen.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m a lazy persuader. I tend to realize that most of what people know about communicating is intuitive and natural, so I have learned to pay attention to my own other-than-conscious signals and trust them. Your unconscious can keep track of much more information than you think.</p>
<p>The psych nurses called me to help them with a man who was very angry with them for reasons that only he knew. When I got there, he was sitting (which is a good thing, generally speaking, for an angry person to be doing when you&#8217;re in front of them) and ranting to himself. The charge nurse stood aside and waited for me to say some magic words. (She&#8217;d seen me work before.) I listened for a bit and then opened my mouth to say something I thought was particularly persuasive, and I received a little nudge from the back of my mind. It went something like this here:</p>
<p><strong>SHUT UP AND LISTEN!</strong></p>
<p>So I did.</p>
<p>I listened for a little while longer, got some more information, thought to myself, OK, it&#8217;s time to talk now, opened my mouth to say something I thought would be even more persuasive than the first thing, and there was that, um, still, calm, gentle voice again:</p>
<p><strong>SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!</strong></p>
<p>OK, OK, so I shut up and listened some more while he ranted. Then he gave me what I thought was a truly important bit of information, and I was glad I had paid attention to my unconscious urgings to be quiet. With that key information, I again went to open my mouth to say something powerfully persuasive, and you&#8217;ll never guess&#8230;</p>
<p><strong>SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!!</strong></p>
<p>Now, I consider myself an intelligent fellow, and I can take a subtle hint. So I shut up for good. I sat and listened, just as I had before, making the little facial expressions and nods and grunts that demonstrated I was honestly listening to what he had to say. And within a minute or so he calmed down. And then he realized he was out of line.</p>
<p>The truth is, that&#8217;s all he needed. Someone to hear him out, to take in what he was saying without trying to convince him he was mistaken. The more he talked, them more I listened, the more he talked himself out of what he was saying. And I didn&#8217;t have to say a thing.</p>
<p>Because, you see, inside every &#8220;unreasonable&#8221; person, there&#8217;s a calm and peaceful person who&#8217;d rather be in charge.</p>
<p><a href="http://nlphilia.net/2007/10/27/shut-up-and-listen/" rel="bookmark">SHUT UP AND LISTEN!</a> originally appeared on <a href="http://nlphilia.net">NLPhilia Blog</a> on 2007-10-27 (Saturday).</p>
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